aBOUT
A Danger to Myself and Others is a concept album, about a psychological breakdown and recovery. In this story, the main character, Big Bottom, grew up in a dysfunctional family, endured a violent and abused childhood, and was betrayed by those closest to him. This betrayal hurt him to the core. He couldn’t process it, so he got caught in a whirlwind of hatred and resentment, which cycled in his mind, over and over, consuming his very sanity. Big Bottom is an Indie songwriter, and when he had his breakdown, he sank into the depths of despair. In order to deal with the chaos in his mind, he reimagined himself as a rock star, living in a rock and roll fantasy world. In this fantasy world, he partied like a rock star. Trashing hotel rooms, drinking to excess, and promoting an imaginary album. He believed he was on tour with a famous rock band, and had no limits. Big Bottom lost trust in everyone in his life, and started hanging around with people who were destructive to him. He was trying to kill himself, drinking to excess, taking dangerous drugs he would never take in his right mind, and getting in to fights. He eventually drank himself in to a coma and almost died in the hospital. During his time in the hospital, Big Bottom went in to a deep psychosis, where he was being tortured in a surreal hellscape, almost died, and suddenly found his long dormant self-confidence and his will to live was restored. With the help of the woman he loved, he clawed his way back to sanity, but there was one more challenge. He had to deal with the nature of the family he came from, and the narcissistic personality disorder which defined the childhood abuse that he endured. He was forced to confront very painful feelings. He still didn’t trust anyone and recalled all of the abuse, dysfunction, and the damage done to his own life, and everyone’s around him. Accepted his own role in the course of his life, and finally found compassion, for those who had done him harm. Big Bottom, having found his path to recovery, builds a life of creativity, helping others where he can, and being there for those he loves. To be….a different kind of man. Oh, and Big Bottom likes to smoke weed. Lots of weed.
The album, a Danger to Myself and Others, came together through working with two of my oldest and dearest friends, Chris Amelar and Rob Melosh. We were in the same bands, back in the late ‘70s/early ‘80s. I started writing and recording demos of the songs in 2018, as a therapeutic way to deal with traumatic events in my own life. I was struggling with my own demons. Circumstances became such that I was unable to perform the parts on the album to the level of quality they needed to be. In 2021, Chris took on the project as producer, after I had recorded demos of almost all of the songs. The demos were not to the professional level of quality that I would have liked, but the songs were there, so Chris suggested that I step back as songwriter and let him bring in professional musicians to record the album. I had already gotten drum and lead tracks from Billy Sherwood of Yes, and Billy Alexander of YYNOT. Chris was also able to get artists like Jordan Rudess of Dream Theater and Andrew Ross of Trans-Siberian Orchestra. I also had some dear friends from around the globe like Owen Lelean from Australia and Lady Llinos Amana from Wales available to do tracks. So it was an easy decision to step back as songwriter. I got to appear on a few parts of the album, like contributing vocals in Boogie Woogie and Hatred, Bass and synth parts on Scapegoat and Betrayal, and most of the parts on Where’s the Ganja. In the time between the summer of ‘21 when production began, and the album’s release in October of 2024, I had moved and began a new life up in the mountains. Tracks were sent over the internet and I approved the songs as they came together. Chris had a very busy gigging schedule, so once the parts were recorded, we decided to turn mixing and mastering over to Rob Melosh at R.E.M. Studios in New Jersey. We sent mixes back and forth and I added some tracks, myself. After evaluating mixes and masters, we finally had a finished product at the end of September 2024 and the album was released on digital media on October 2nd.
The purpose of this album is to tell this story, so that others who can relate can be comforted by knowing that they are not alone, and that there is a path to a happy life. There is a severe mental health crisis in the world right now. Since Covid, mental health resources are overwhelmed, and there are not enough professionals to meet the demands of the public. As a result, people can’t get the treatment they need and suffer deeply. It is my goal to raise awareness of this issue, and to encourage anyone reading this to consider a career in psychological health care. This album was written in anger, pain, and despair, but in the end, it came together with love, friendship, and recovery.
The album, a Danger to Myself and Others, came together through working with two of my oldest and dearest friends, Chris Amelar and Rob Melosh. We were in the same bands, back in the late ‘70s/early ‘80s. I started writing and recording demos of the songs in 2018, as a therapeutic way to deal with traumatic events in my own life. I was struggling with my own demons. Circumstances became such that I was unable to perform the parts on the album to the level of quality they needed to be. In 2021, Chris took on the project as producer, after I had recorded demos of almost all of the songs. The demos were not to the professional level of quality that I would have liked, but the songs were there, so Chris suggested that I step back as songwriter and let him bring in professional musicians to record the album. I had already gotten drum and lead tracks from Billy Sherwood of Yes, and Billy Alexander of YYNOT. Chris was also able to get artists like Jordan Rudess of Dream Theater and Andrew Ross of Trans-Siberian Orchestra. I also had some dear friends from around the globe like Owen Lelean from Australia and Lady Llinos Amana from Wales available to do tracks. So it was an easy decision to step back as songwriter. I got to appear on a few parts of the album, like contributing vocals in Boogie Woogie and Hatred, Bass and synth parts on Scapegoat and Betrayal, and most of the parts on Where’s the Ganja. In the time between the summer of ‘21 when production began, and the album’s release in October of 2024, I had moved and began a new life up in the mountains. Tracks were sent over the internet and I approved the songs as they came together. Chris had a very busy gigging schedule, so once the parts were recorded, we decided to turn mixing and mastering over to Rob Melosh at R.E.M. Studios in New Jersey. We sent mixes back and forth and I added some tracks, myself. After evaluating mixes and masters, we finally had a finished product at the end of September 2024 and the album was released on digital media on October 2nd.
The purpose of this album is to tell this story, so that others who can relate can be comforted by knowing that they are not alone, and that there is a path to a happy life. There is a severe mental health crisis in the world right now. Since Covid, mental health resources are overwhelmed, and there are not enough professionals to meet the demands of the public. As a result, people can’t get the treatment they need and suffer deeply. It is my goal to raise awareness of this issue, and to encourage anyone reading this to consider a career in psychological health care. This album was written in anger, pain, and despair, but in the end, it came together with love, friendship, and recovery.